YOUR FAVORITE TEE AND YOUR FAVORITE FEATHER PERSON! $25 a pop! Need 5 or more? $20 a pop. Join the Scooter Army! This is obnoxious, this is beautiful, this is ridiculous, this is fun, this makes people smile! Get yours today while supplies last! Limited edition. After this, Scooter is running for president. New Merch. New Campaign. This is SEWWWIOUSSS!
Sizes run small, so order one size up from your normal gender confused unisex size. She/Her Owner of feather person is 5'8" on a good day and 135 lbs and usually wears a small unisex tee, but she needed a medium. Tiny stylish she/her maternal unit pictured here is 5'1" and 113lbs and rocking a small. Bartender Teresa lighting up a Scooter Medium in Neon! Next fab she/her blond in the orange skirt with the unhumanly long legs is sporting a Medium. All shirts fit long legs really well. Him/He model claims to be 6 feet tall, but he also tells good fish stories. He/Him now claims he shrunk 'an inch' due to his massive muscle structure. He's 185 lbs of sheer fun, according to him, and is wearing a Large. More he/him models please. And our lovely Peggy is keeping Wisconsin cool in her XL! After that, every goofball sporting merch gets added to this magnificent page. If you're on the mobile site, these pictures are a hot mess.
Email me with orders firstname.lastname@example.org
Accepts Venmo, PayPal, Zelle, Cash, Checks, BMW's, Gold IRA's, Trust Funds.
Include your mailing address and I'll figure out Shipping/Handling from there - either USPS, FedEx, DHL, or UPS depending where you are in the world and how fast you want it. Be demanding. We'll email. We'll figure things out. It will be fun and annoying all at the same time. Meanwhile, find yer size:
Small: Pit to Pit 17"; Length 27”
Medium: Pit to Pit 19”; Length 28”
Large: Pit to Pit 20”; Length 29”
XL: Pit to Pit 23"; Length 31”
XXL: Pit to Pit 25”; Length 31”
Oh yeah, and we've also got sunglasses ($5 each) and USB Sticks ($25 each). USB comes with installed 4 Jamie CD's: My Desire of You, Hallelujah, Jamie Oldies & Piano Solos; PLUS 24 suspenseful videos of chicken reality shows, chicken interviews, chicken newsfeeds, chicken talk shows, and some band stuff. Hours of Entertainment!
Cheap! But not as cheap as Bud Light. We have standards.
Don't Miss Out! Email your orders to: email@example.com